Sunday, February 2, 2014

Who likes to go to a good football game? This girl for sure! At any important sporting event, the end score is usually the most important part. Throughout the season its important to keeps records of wins and losses in order to decide which teams get placed in post-season play. People often remember or talk about a team's record. The scorecard is touted as important. Surprisingly over the years, I have been able to put some really positive aspects of sports to good use in my 17 years of marriage to a football coach. Scorecard is most definitely NOT one of those things. Keep the scores, the wins and losses, on the field...the court...the mat, which ever is your sport. But by no means allow it to have a home within your marriage.
Words to not say to your spouse when you are asked to do something, "Well what are you gonna do for me?" Marriage is not a tick for tack relationship. I believe whole heartedly that in a marriage each day it is your job to strive to do something to make your spouse's day better. I'm not talking about some grandiose gesture (although that would work too :) ), sometimes it truly is the small things that end up meaning the most. Even if this is what you try to do, you cannot do it with expectations in your heart. You simply do it because you can. Simple things that would be fun gestures include a positive text sent to your spouse in the middle of the day, picking up your spouse's favorite treat or drink, you could even complete a task for your spouse that would free up time for him/her.
It is so easy in our society to keep a scorecard. There is so much about "I." There is not enough "you" or "we." If you choose to be thoughtful towards your spouse, do it to show your spouse how important he/she is. But never mark the scorecard...it will only lead you down a road that is not meant for a healthy, loving marriage.

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